The Mindset for Moving On
Taking your power back and taking charge requires at least 3 basic steps. These steps may appear to others that you are being selfish, self-centered and maybe egotistical. It’s not selfish – it’s self-first. Putting yourself first is vital to getting to an empowered state. How can you be of service to yourself if you are taking care of everyone else’s needs and putting yours last? It’s not possible. To all the wonderful mothers and fathers who have sacrificed everything for their children, having no social life, no downtime, no time for personal growth, and no relaxation, because you are raising children. What glory is in that? Especially when you look up and your children are grown and gone and you are left with no life of your own. Or to all the loyal employees who have endured and tolerated on-the-job stress and anxiety, while sacrificing your goals and desires just to keep the boss happy and the dollars flowing. What have you really gained if you are not happy in the process?
Mindset steps to move on
1, Don’t be self-ish – be self-first. Forcefully and decisively move TOWARD your best self, your most magnificent and amazing self, focusing on YOUR values YOUR goals, YOUR dreams, and yes, YOUR issues.
2. Own whats wrong. If you have known issues – deal with them! I’m talking about deep insecurities, strong anxieties, anger issues, resentment issues, etc. One of the biggest problems I see with so many people reading self-help books is that they apply polish right on top of their issues, and the real issues never get dealt with. Let’s face it – we all have something! When you identify it, roll it into step 1 above, and work on it.
3. Don’t do what’s right – do what’s best. This may sound crazy, but the fact of the matter is doing the right thing may not always be the best thing. The right thing involves emotional thinking, moral thinking and religous or spiritual thinking. It may also include doing what others want or expect you to do. While there is nothing bad about these things – they are all relative and vary from person to person. What is right for you, may not be right for someone else and vice versa. Not only that, these forms of thinking may take you away from logic, reason, and common sense. On the other hand – doing the best thing evaluates the practical pros and cons of a situation and makes logical rational decisions based on facts and instincts. This strategy for decision-making and choosing behaviors is superior and when executed properly will also prove to be the right thing. One way to know how to do what is BEST versus what is RIGHT is to check in with your head (brain) AND your heart! In other words, when you have made a decision to act, react or respond in a certain manner, check in with your HEART and ask, “does this feel proper”? “Will the outcome produce the best results for all involved”? “Am I honoring my authentic self”? If the answer to these questions is “yes”, then you are doing what is BEST and you are putting self-first.
